Allow me to introduce you to the #1 rated high school football prospect in the country. He hails from St. Paul, Minnesota, stands 6 foot 8, weighs 338 pounds, and has scholarship offers from the biggest and baddest schools in college football. From the looks of him, he could open a hole big enough for Oprah to run through, and could intimidate even the meanest of defensive lineman. He is virtually guaranteed to be a dominant force in the NFL in a few years, and be a symbol of what an NFL lineman is supposed to look like.

But there's one problem...his name is Seantrel. Yes, that's right. SHAWN-TRELLE. This behemoth of a man who is going to make a living hurting other people has a name that invokes visions of a cross-dresser on Bourbon street. "Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, out of the TWIN CITIES...Seantrel!" It's pretty clear that Seantrel's parents aren't cut from the same mold as say, Bubba Paris's folks.

Speaking of large Africans...I'm sure by now you've heard about the pictures of Greg Oden that have surfaced on the Internet. Big O decided to send a picture of himself, naked, to a girl he was trying to bang. Now the photo has inevitably reached the web, and we're all welcome to take a peak at the flacid piece owned by a man who stand 7 feet tall. It's no shock to anyone that Oden is hung like Seabiscuit, but what is surprising to some people is that he would take a photo like this of himself. Me...I'm not surprised by that part. What surprises me is that, judging by his career thus far, he doesn't possess a 24 inch gash between his legs. Hey Greg...why don't you spend more time in the training room and less time taking pictures of whatever you call that thing between your legs?

The Super Bowl Hype Machine is in full swing, and I for one, am already SICK OF IT. I realize that Peyton Manning is from New Orleans, and his cocksucker for a Dad played for the Saints when they used to get beat like Brett Myers wife, but enough already! The game is in Miami, not New Orleans. This is more of a homecoming for REGGIE WAYNE (former Miami Hurricane) than it is for Peyton Manning. I'm willing to bet that CBS has about 8 hours of pre-game coverage devoted to the Manning back story, and I won't watch 2 seconds of it. I'd rather watch re-runs of Jersey Shores than see another clip of Archie tossing the pigskin around with Peyton, Eli, and Cooper.

That's all for today. Thanks for reading.